Ancient
***VIP's Boss***
 Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 912
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In acest fic va voi povesti despre Viata Zieului Thuar.(numele reiakl ie sub anonimat)
Personaje: Thuar ;Ieu (autuarea),Cadaver (ioana),Beliroz,Ivanescu,mama lu Thuar,tata lu Thuar,si mai cateva personaje episodice( familia de puradei,Coistel,gagicile care fac topless,politistul rutier,etc)
1.Se inserase,iar piersonajul noustru principal,Zieul Thoar se indrepta spre casa lui cu 10 ietaje.Iel calca apasand cu putere pe pamantul moale de la atata ploaie.pasarile ciripeau.Lui nu-i plac pasarile,iel vrea liniste.In jur numai oameni care discuta.Lui nu-i place asa ca grabeste pasu.
2.In fata lui se vede mirifica lui casa cu 10 ietaje,de langa statuia ierioilor din Timisoara.S eparopie de o masinarie numita interfon,si formiaza niste numiere.Deodata se aude o vocie:
-cine ie acolo?
-ieu,Cristinel.raspunde zeul
-Hai javra,intra.
3. Iera mama lui care il pofteste inautru.urca cu grija scarile,pana cand ajunge in fata camerei sale..O deshide pasand pe cleana,se descalti de cizmele lui de zieu,si se pune in pat la tielevizor.Butoneaza dar nu gaseste nimic interesant asa ca se pune la calculator,intra pe misenger.Acolo in vede pe autorul acestui senzational roman salutandu-l.Iel nervos,urla la masa:
-Mama,adumi apa
-Dute si i-ati!Da' ce-s ieu aici?
Nextu dupa vreo 2-3 posturi
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..abea ajtept ..so ..bagatzi mah si voi comm`uri ca sa poata puna nextu!:X  
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Ancient
***VIP's Boss***
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 912
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uite pun nextu pentru tine,ca pe celalte nu le intereseaza
4. deja se facuse rosu de furie.Se gadnea iel :"Ce zeu mai sunt si ieu daca nimenea nu face ce vreu?!".Se ridica de pe scaun merge in in bucatarie.
-Unde ie apa minerala?
-Nu avem,raspunde masa.bea de la chiuveta ca nu mori
Thoar deschide robineta
-mama,nu avem apa rece.
-da bea calda,care ie problema?
-Pai ie fierbinte
-Daca tii sete beao asa.
5.Thoar isi pune apa fierbinte intr-un pahar,si se intoarce la calculator.Opa!ce vede iel?Are o noua fata in lista..una cadaver..Intra pe ea,se uita la poza de la avatrul iei..deodata simte ceva..ceva puternic..se arsese la limba.Se duce la baie,se uita in wc.In apa wc-ului pluteau cacati pe care i facuse iel az dimineata.Trage apa,si deodata,baia iete inundata de viermi.
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~bill is my love~
***VIP's Boss***
 Din: craiova
Inregistrat: acum 18 ani
Postari: 1975
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nextt si repejorrrr
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Ancient
***VIP's Boss***
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 912
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8.trrr!trrr!!Aude ceasul..iara visase.."ce pacat" in sinea lui.Iera ora 9:30.La 9:45 avea programare la solarul de vis-a-vis de gen2.se scoala repede din pat,isi ia cizmele,si fuge in pijamale spre salonul "monica".CUm fugea iel,calca intr-o guma roz d mancat,nu ii da atentie,si isi continua drumul..
9.Ajuns iin salon,toate fumeile ii admira pijamaua verde cu ratuste.Thoar iera transpirat de la atata fuga asa ca cere permisiunea sa fie uscat cu foenul.Cand aude pretul pentru o uscare cu feonul se ia cu mainile de cap,ca nu ii ajung banii si pientru solar,si pentru uscat.Tot miloginduse de asistete sa-i fac o reducere,ajunge la un acord cu iele.Pijamaua in schimbul usactului.ZIs si facut.Isi da jos pantalonii verzi,si bluza verde,si se indreapta spre solar,in bocserii lui albi.
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super tareeeee ..next pleaseeeee Anicient:*
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ale_xandra
°Mega-VIP Immer Zusammen°๋
 Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 4526
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ii super tare ficul.....pune nextul!
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da foarte tare baga baga nextul 
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~bill is my love~
***VIP's Boss***
Din: craiova
Inregistrat: acum 18 ani
Postari: 1975
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nextttttttttttttttttttttttttttt
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Ancient
***VIP's Boss***
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 912
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10.Sta sub chiestia aia luminoasa timp de 2 ore,apoi se scoala,se intande,si pleaca.I iera rusine sa mearga in chiloti pe strada,asa ca ia un sac gaurit si in pune pe transul.Merge tantos pe strada lauanduse cu cea mai noua achizitie a sa.Un fost sac de carat lemne,acum aruncat la tomberoan.I se parea ca arata superb cu bocancii lui plini cu guma de mestecat roz,si cu sacul plin de noroi.
11.Ajunge in fata blocului,unde vecina de la ietajul 3 se uite la iel foarte insistent.Thoar deschide usa si deodata vecina Olga incepe:
-Mi-a adus tac'tu banii pentru intretinere?Pai cat astept aci?Se face anu si iel nimic!
-nu stiu
-da ce stii tu inafara sa vii napte la ora 3 acasa?
12.Thoar urca nervos scarile,deschide usa si acolo simte un miros puternic de spanac cu telemea.Ciudat.In casa nu iera nimeni.Intra in bucatarie,si deodata isi vede toate rudele la o masa catand la multi ani.
-Ce se intamapla aici?intreaba Thoar mirat
-Vai,puiule,azi motanelul nostru face 2 ani.ii raspunde mama sa.
-ce?!Pentru o pisica amarata faci spanac cu telemea si pentru mine nimic???
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Bloody_Angel
๋°Senior Member°
 Din: Braila..un oraj pustiu
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 284
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buey ce-am mai ras  pone nextu' plyzz
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Ancient
***VIP's Boss***
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 912
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13.Mama sa il privii mirata si isi continua treaba,adica sa cante la multi ani.Thoar se duce in camera sa si intra pe miess.Iera liniste.Statea acolo de 5 minute si nimeni nu ii zise nimic.Ceva lipsea.Ii iera dor sa-l bata cineva la cap.Sa o scoata sau nu pe Ancienta de la ignoar?Toata asta iera in capu' lui."Nu,ei lasa,ca nu-i strica sa steie mai mult".
14.Ce josnic se simtea..Incerca sa se deie mare pe la toti,si neifricat,lipsit de consiinta,ca un mare zeu ce se credea.Dar nu-i iesea.Isi ia tricoul verde,si blugii pe care ii poarta in toate zilele,si se indreapa spre iesire.Isi bocancii plini de guma roz,si iese afara.Statea pe scarile blocului,intins,zicandu-si: "Somnic pufos",si cade in somn lin.Se trezeste pe la ora 7seara,si urca in camera sa.manca niste rosii cu branza si itra pe mess.Acolo,frumoasa lui Ioana il astepta.Urmau sa se intalneasca la mare.Deja se vedea imbratisand-o si sarutand-o de sus pana jos.
15.Cum statea el linistit,cufundat in visele sale,intra Beliroz pe iel: "O zis Teo s-o scoti de la ignore".Moment de furie,ii scapa o injuratura.Thoar planuia a da o spre pe draga nuastra autoare lui Olteanu' care urma sa-i fie tata.Poprunca ii este indeplinita.
16.Se simtea bine.Se simtea zeu.Discuta cu Ioana fara sa-l deranjeze nimeni.
-Mama adu-mi o cana de apa!striga el
-Imediat!
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~bill is my love~
***VIP's Boss***
Din: craiova
Inregistrat: acum 18 ani
Postari: 1975
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nextttttttttt 
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este foarte interesant vreau nextuuuuuuuuuuu
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Ancient
***VIP's Boss***
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 912
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19.iera diminiata zilei de 22iulie.Thoar se simeta bine..Ii placea sa fie chiel.Ii placea sa-i luceasca chielia in suare,si sa ase plimbe pe 45 de grade in bocancii cu guma roz lipita pe iei.Iera gata sa infrunte orice.Isi luase exhipamentul de robin hood,adica tricou verde,blugi si bocseri albi,si se duse in gara sa-l astepte pe Ivanescu care trebea sa sosiasca de la sanicolau Mare.I era tiama.Iera pe terioriu Ancientei,adica al autuarei.Asta inseamna ca pueta la orice pas sa primeasca un topor in cap si sa muara.Insa nu s-a intamplat asa.Autuarea a fost insa milostiva si nu i-a facut nimic,lasandu-l sa circule liber.
20.Urca in tren,aleg un compartiment,si se pun pe scaune.Drum lung de la Timisoara pana la COnstanta..Ii astepta o nuapte grea.
21.Se inserase,iar Thoar mort de somn se pune sa se culce.Saracul Ivanescu nu putu dormi tota nuaptea din cauza sforaiturilor lui thoar,si a besinilor.Iera imposibil sa respiri aierul ala..Dar Ivanescu,paralizat de miros,se lasa dus,si lesina.
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foarte tare vreau nextuuuuuuuu
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Ancient
***VIP's Boss***
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 912
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23.Mai trecu ceva timp,ora era deja 11,iar ei erau aproape in Constanta.Thoar era ingrijorat,nu se spalase pe picioare,si nu isi puse masca impotriva ridurilor pe fata.Thuar ieste un tip foarte atent cu iel.Se epileaza pe picioare si la sub brat,si in alte locuri,chiar si pe cap.Probabil ca daca ar fii avut par mai lung,isi facea coc.
24.In sfarsit ajunsesera la Constanta,iar acolo era locul unde cei 2 se despartira.In statie(sau gara o.O) ii astepta falnicul berliroz,care,nu bause nimic,ciudat,si era deja ora 11jumate.Ivanescu o luase pe drumul sau,iar Thoar se duse cu berliroz.Autoarea de abia acuma afla ca iel defape ie berliroz,nu Beliroz:-?..Cica ie Berlioz
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e foarte tare imi plake zoooper muult vreau next
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ok hai fetele cu commuri va roooog
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Ancient
***VIP's Boss***
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 912
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25.Dupa zile de stat nemancat in casa baiatului,Thoar se duce la Ieforie pentru as intalnii iubirea..frumoasa lui zeita cadaver,cu care isi imagina ca isi va petrece tot restul vietii.O vede si se indragosteste pe loc de ia...A fo' dragoste la prima vedere.Statura si se pupara,pana se facu siara,iar Thoar urma sa se duca sa-si vada mama.Aceasta foarte secsi in costum de baie in chiama sa mearga in apa.
26.isi ia chilotii albastrii de pe sarma,si intra in mare.Isi uitase colacul la mal,iar apa ii ajungea deja pana la buric.valuri de 15 cm treceau prin iel iar acesta simtea ca se scufunda.Deodata,simte ceva frumos..iera cald.se pisase pe iel.Se lasa pe spate,si un val il tranti pana pe pamant...peste cateva minute,e la tarm,cu 2 salvamari langa,care il resuscitau.e clar,se inecase prostu..Totul numai din vina lui Ivanescu,pentru ca autuarea il avertiza sa ia colac pentru Thoar,dar acesta refuza,spunand ca are incredere in iel.
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neeeeeeeeexxxxxxxtttttttt
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Ancient
***VIP's Boss***
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 912
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27.Thuar a spus ca ieste prea grimm ca sa mai steie la plaja,asa ca se duse la hautel...Iera speriat...se puse pe pat si incepuse se planga....Cum sa se intample asa ceva unui zieu cum ie iel?"Aha,dar daca nu ieram zieu,muream..deci tot zieu raman".Isi spunia iel.Se duse pe balcon,si ridicand mainile spuse: "ieu Zeul ordon sa vina acum un fulger".Si asa se intampla.Ie clar iera zeu!!!
28.2 minute mai tarziu incepu o pluaie teribila.Nimeni nu mai iera pe plaja..Afara tuna si fulgera.Thuar,fericit,se duse pe blacon si : "Pluaie opreste-te".Nimic.Incearca din nou: "ZFulgere numai fulgerati".Iara nimic.Se puse in pat sa doarma.Avuse un vis foarte ciudat...
29.Se facia ca un nour mare zbura deasupra lui,in timp iel umbla imbracat ca robin hud,umbla pe strada cu pelerina.Si zicia: "ieu zeu ordon sa vina un fulger si sa imi aduca banane".SI tot asa.Deoadta se trezi.Mama lui iera acolo,treaza.Thuar cu ochii aburiti,se duce pe balcon deschide bratele: "ieu zeu ordon sa se opreasca pluaia".Thuar deschise ochii.Numai ploua.
-AI vazut mami?AM oprit pluaia \:d/
-Numai ploua de 3 ore.
-ba eu acuma am oprit-o.
-Ai probleme grave.
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e suuper frumos fah ancient pune nextuuuuuuuuuuuu
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Ancient
***VIP's Boss***
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 912
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fah daca va pun sa povestiti stie cineva ceva?:-?
ma rog
30.Thuar se duse pe hol.Isi zicea: "ce proasta e femeia asta,vede ca am orpit pluaia si nu zice nimic".Deodata,din camera 471,se aude: "Parintii nu ma inteleg,pretenii greu s-aleg vai de viata mea!!!Duscmani-mi dau tarcuale,pasa-ri calatoare,vai de viata mia".Thuar se pune sa planga cu lacrimi sarate,si muci lichizi.ii placea gustul lacrimilor combinate cu muci.I se parea foarte grimm ce face.Statea pe hol band muci si lacrimi.
31.Se ridica in picioare."Ieu zeu ordon sa dispara maikmea".Intra in camera..mama sa nu iera acolo.Numai tac'su care sforaia.radea pe sub mustata tunsa pe care nu o avia.Spune ironic: "nah,acuma vezi ca sunt zieu?".Se misca ceva sub pat..era ma-sa..
-Ah,Cristinel,tu ierai...uof,crediam ca ie patronu hautelului.Nu i-am platit nuaptea asta de cazare..
Thuar nervos isi lua chilotii albastri cu buline roz si se duse sa faca dus.
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Devilish Girl
°Super-VIP Immer Zusammen๋
 Din: Iasi
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 1230
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 cumva ejti aja de suparata k ai facut asta j in realitate?
Modificat de Devilish Girl (acum 17 ani)
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antonella_nikoll
๋°Senior Member°
Inregistrat: acum 17 ani
Postari: 177
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super tare..
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